Sunday, December 14, 2008

Poll Tying Iggy's Support With Harper's Is Premature

Newly-coronated-without-election Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff stands up and, for some mysterious reason, cocks one of his scary eyebrows while his Librano slaves look around, dazed and confused, obviously brain-dormant, eagerly awaiting to unquestioningly, unthinkingly obey any and all orders from their Dear Leader


The Toronto Star, a notoriously Liberal-loyalist corporate media outlet, excitedly released a poll the other day.

The poll claims that newly coronated-without-an-election Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff is supported as "best to lead the country" to an extent that ties with Prime Minister Harper's.

Something's fishy about this poll.

The truth is that the Canadian People are familiar with Harper's abilities, as he's been actually running the country for quite awhile already.

But Canadians don't know Michael Ignatieff from Adam, so it's a little stupid that so many would assume that this guy, Mr. Whatshisname, whoever he is, could necessarily be as able to run the country as Harper has already proven he can.

Besides, when you ask a different question, this time as to which party you'd vote for today, the Harper Conservatives kick sand into the Iggy Liberals' faces, causing the weaklings to dry up and blow.

To its credit, the Toronto Star also released this poll, which says that Canadians would give the Harper Conservatives a majority government if an election was held today. The Harper Tories would get 45% whereas the Libs would get a measly 26% under the new guy Ignatieff.

So I wouldn't read too much into a poll that has an equal number of Canadians assuming, without knowing a bloody thing about what they're saying, that Iggy would be best to lead Canada. What's next, try a little mischievous scientific poll that asks Canadians the same question, but replacing Iggy's name with Rowan Atkinson's. Wouldn't shock me if Rowan Atkinson ties PM Harper as the best to run the country then. Of course, most Canadians probably don't realize that Rowan Atkinson is the guy who plays Mr. Bean!

So the Conservatives have a job to do now. They'll have to introduce Iggy to Canadians! Canadians, meet Iggy. He's an intolerant bully who forbids people from speaking except as he himself unilaterally deems. And he favored the Iraq war and expressed support for torture. The guy's right-wing, fofecksake; right-wing! OMG! Right-wing bad, right? Therefore Iggy bad and scary and will take your rights away and put people with guns on the streets of Canada... Choose your Canada! Gotta vote for the moderate, safe guys, then, the Conservatives!

(Yes, I'm being a little sarcastic here, mocking the Tories' opponents who think it means something to slur them as "right-wing", as if "right-wing" was something inherently, necessarily bad).

That'll work. Or something sort of like that, a little less silly, a little less like the brainless crap the Liberals tried and failed to use on Harper.